Bittersweet symphony

Staring at the screen doing nothing.

Just doing this entry. Yesterday I was doing the same thing. But I was listening not just staring. Listening to the sound of those melodic tunes and the lyrical prowess of the song. The delicious vocals made me long for something or someone.

I listened over and over and over repeating each songs and the lyrics stayed in my mind and I know I’m gonna listen to it again. It’s soothing to the point of making me dream of  the moment.. whatever they are.  I don’t think there’s  feeling at all. I mean who am kidding? C’mon. Well, I just want to savor the used to be sarcasm of life moments and everything else. Man, I wanna laugh.

You know what’s funny about this, I’m acting as if there’s something when there’s actually nothing. It’s all played out here in the virtual web of insanity. I have life that exists here more than my own real world does and sometimes things becomes superficial because everything is  inside this sort of idiot box of screen. I know I am real though. Everything about me is. But the the less they know the better it. For my sake at least. I am the type who easily gets attached and I don’t forget. I always remember.

The net is a tool for the many who seek to avert the reality of life. I’ve been staring and babbling online for many years. I’ve made friends but in the process also had enemies. I don’t consider them as such though because they don’t even exist.

The one thing that’s real are the feelings . Years spent loitering the web hidden in concealed desire. I easily feel that everything’s coming back. I am still indifferent to most and to everyone and could care less what people would say.

Perhaps the previous comment was correct in that I should concentrate with the present and not regress with the things of the past. Can’t help though.

I am still here same as ever. No change at all.

And now if you’ll excuse me, I wanna overdose myself with the sound that triggers a sensation.


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